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(this time in the form of a blond boy from class) Daydreams - hell - fantasies Full Fledged! Keeping me from sleep. Watching the tree outside sway, with the false light of street lamps behind it. The same window my muse walks past (ivy framed - I look out to see). We probably have nothing in common. but at 3AM the thought of him, (in glaze covered scrubs) makes me smile makes me grin makes me start to think of getting him under my hands my fingers beneath the folds of his clothes the feel of his breath on my skin. Completely Unattainable (a safe crush)! But at 3AM I grin I smile like a fool at the mere idea of him in my room in my bed; or slow dancing - romancing me under the christmas lights on my ceiling. At 3AM writing like a maniac flashes of thoughts - Like him walking past my window, tie hanging loosely around his neck and the button up shirt refusing to hide the necklace he always wears. He probably got it from his girlfriend. He's probably desperately in love with her, but at 3AM - I don't care. I just sit on the floor in front of my futon switching songs - feeling the throes of a crush in my soul Imagining the thoughts - (naughty little thoughts they are) like pushing him against a wall, like catching him off guard, pulling him into the storage closet for a few minutes ( a few precious seconds) of a lustful, passionate encounter that would raise a few eyebrows when we emerge. Skin flushed, hair ruffled, blushing at the exposure and giving a secret knowing look walking away - in different directions. At 3AM I wonder I think I conive Sweetness passes through, breezes by, an innocent walk by the river, through the trails at the park. holding hands, kissing me under Orion's gaze, at 3AM. At 3AM I get so excited, I plan I plot I design I create I write (too much?) Oh my insomnia. Bitter sweet, fucking dreamless, sleepless nights. At 3AM not sure what I want - Dreams or fantasies - Reality? Dualities - my duality. At 3AM - a shift in time. Stuck between the reality of my world (grey carpet, class in 6 hours, homework I should be attending to) the reality and the dream (the future as it will be and the future as I want it to be) Busy building memories off the dream; memories to be forgotten until the next 3AM. Reality breaking in (the pain in my fingers - sleep crawling through my brain) At 3AM Sweet inspirational Insomnia - At 3AM. Back |